Bottom line.... my body is a wreck and it doesn't provide me with any sense of stability and security. Hate the way I am aging much too early, began at 50 but especially since I am alone. Who would have guessed this is how I would enter Old Age? Not me. Arch, if he is aware, would be shocked. He was so fit until the end. However, his major concern for me was around falling. Perhaps he had a premonition.
Or it was due to my first fall when I was 3 months pregnant and feeling sick after a CT scan. No connection just coincidental . I felt nauseaus and went to the bathroom. I vomited into the toilet and passed out, pitched head first into the bathtub. Fortunately I didn't hurt myself, I sure could have as all the taps were so close to my head. I could have had a concussion or worse. Arch heard it all from the bedroom and rushed in to see me lying unconcious and proceeded to retrieve me from he tub. Not an easy task with a dead weight of.200 lbs at the time. I finally revived and was put back in bed. He had to clean the entire bathroom from all the vomit that I had spewed everywhere. He got me settled into my bed with a bowl between my knees in case I needed to vomit again.
I did, passed out, unconscious, my head shot backwards and hit the headboard and once again spewed vomit all over the bed. I recovered without any injury. Poor Arch, had to change the bed etc. He never complained but was so concerned and attentive. It was undoubtedly an experience that left a profound impact on him and became his ongoing concern. Rightfully so since it has now become the Greatest Health Risk for me. Who would ever have guessed since I was so agile and strong prior to turning before 50. Could probably have competed with any man. Still can't accept it myself.
With Arch's premontion resurfacing, I will now be more aware and become concious of every step or move I make. Sure limits one's independence. That sucks, along with all my other issues.