Sunday, July 1, 2012

Oh My God. I Fell Again.

This time in my kitchen and with my sandals on Thank GOD. They helped provide the traction I needed to 'butt' crawl across the kitchen floor, the hallway and my bedroom until I could get to my bed. By that I mean I was able to inch my way by rocking my buttocks back and forth. Took half an hour plus and once I got to my bed spent another 15 minutes trying to figure out how to get into it. It should be so simple but in my case it isn't having 2 knee replacements, both now compromised with my last fall and a hip replacement and doesn't appear too stable. In addition with my Tendonitis in both shoulders, I have no strength left whatsoever.  I am so grateful that I didn't incur any major injuries. Just a very sore right knee, and elbows  but no hematoma TG. And as of today, no obvious injuries to my shoulders.

My physical situation scares the shit out of me especially since I live alone. Maybe it was due to having a sleeping right foot which causes me great concern. Expect it is the same nerve that wakes me up at night with splayed toes on both feet facing east or west. Have to get up and walk around to get rid of the cramps. No doubt due to my surgeries and all the scar tissue accumulated from 5 major episodes or Ruptured discs. I was diagnosed with Spinal Stenosis. ( Narrowing of the Spinal Canal)  I have no recall of what casued the fall, it happened too quickly. As I had just come in from a walk outside and putting my sweater on a chair, I expect I have might tripped on the sleeve left on the floor. I will never know. But accidents happen due to the unexpected. Thankfully I landed on my butt versus my face.

Bottom line.... my body is a wreck and it doesn't provide me with any sense of stability and security. Hate the way I am aging much too early, began at 50  but especially since I am alone. Who would have guessed this is how I would enter Old Age? Not me. Arch, if he is aware, would be shocked. He was so fit until the end. However, his major concern for me was around falling. Perhaps he had a premonition.

Or it was due to my first fall when I was 3 months pregnant and feeling sick after a CT scan. No connection just coincidental . I felt nauseaus and went to the bathroom. I vomited into the toilet and passed out, pitched head first into the bathtub. Fortunately I didn't hurt myself, I sure could have as all the taps were so close to my head. I could have had a concussion or worse. Arch heard it all from the bedroom and rushed in to see me lying unconcious and proceeded to retrieve me from he tub. Not an easy task with a dead weight of.200 lbs at the time. I finally revived and was put back in bed. He had to clean the entire bathroom from all the vomit that I had spewed everywhere. He got me settled into my bed with a bowl between my knees in case I needed to vomit again.

I did, passed out, unconscious, my head shot backwards and hit the headboard and once again spewed vomit all over the bed. I recovered without any injury. Poor Arch, had to change the bed etc. He never complained but was so concerned and attentive. It was undoubtedly an experience that left a profound  impact on him and became his ongoing concern. Rightfully so since it has now become the Greatest Health Risk for me. Who would ever have guessed since I was so agile and strong prior to turning before 50. Could probably have competed with any man. Still can't accept it myself.

With Arch's premontion resurfacing, I will now be more aware and become concious of every step or move I make. Sure limits one's independence. That sucks, along with all my other issues.

 ~ Tutte ~