Thursday, November 18, 2010

A Respite from Insomnia


I actually slept 9 hours last night. What a blessing.

Perhaps it was due to speaking on the phone for 5 hours with several people throughout the day and trying out an anti-depressant that my MD had given me the day before.

I am so unfamiliar now by being held captive by other's need to talk and fighting to get a word in edgewise that it becomes so fatiguing. Just confirmed my decision to silence my phone. Few are really capable of a mutual exchange since their own need talk over rides their ability to listen. I have always been a listener and have never really understood the underlying reason why most people suffer from verbal diarrhea. I expect it is due to the fact that they have never really been Heard so there is a need to speak incessantly. Sadly, they learn little from that type of exchange and it becomes a one sided conversation.

Archie, my husband was a fantastic listener and probably why we meshed so well. We always HEARD each other and felt validated. Validation is what everyone craves, sadly. Little do the talkers realize they won't receive it unless they can listen and validate the person they are talking AT. Probably why some peoples memories are so poor. If you don't ask the other person questions, constantly interrupt, then what is there to remember. I don't expect it will ever change.

I will continue to keep my phone silenced. I will initiate a phone call when I am prepared to be advised, judged and invalidated.

~ Tutte ~