Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Lonely Stairs

The above image brings back so many memories from my childhood. I was the youngest of 3 girls but with 4 years between the three of us it made it very difficult to relate and share our experiences.

I recall spending much of my time alone, sitting on stairs whether at home or at my grandfather's trying to conjure up what activity I could engage in that would be fun and bring me some much needed joy. I spent most of my time drawing clothes for my cut up dolls and fantasizing. Even back then my joy came from my ability to express myself creatively.

In retrospect they seem like very lonely years. My Dad was at work, my mother was preoccupied with her household duties and my sisters didn't want me to tag along.

The only person who provided me with what I needed for comfort and emotional nuturance was my beloved Grandfather Soren. I shall never forget him. He loved me unconditionally.

When we immigrated to Canada, I remember sitting on the stairs of our front porch listenting to the old classics. "The Four Lads, The Diamonds and then Elvis Presley.

When we moved from that home, I remember sitting on the stairs of that porch looking across the street that housed 11 boys. I was coming into puberty and all of a sudden they appeaded to me. I met my first boyfriend, Bernard. I have so many stories to tell around this time but won't do it here. Maybe later.

~ Tutte ~