Saturday, September 4, 2010

Counterpart


Regardless of age, I think we all need the opposite energy to create a balance in our lives. I have always gravitated towards the male species because their conversation is far broader and diverse along with an aspect of humour ever present. Much less judgemental and gossipy than most women seem motivated by. Can't stand that aspect of women. Perhaps it has changed over the years as women have come into their own but I have not been privy to that experience except via TV and have very mixed feelings. Mostly unfavourable.

When my family was intact, I was the only female and that was the niche I was most comfortable with. I loved being the observer of all their interactions. They provided me with many hours of gut wrenching laughter. I miss that tremendously. My home was always filled with laughter. My youngest son was like living with a copy of Jim Carrey. He cracked me up.

I will forever regret not having a daughter because it would have been much easier to develop a bond and share my female experiences with. It's a deeper bond although I know for some it also includes great conflict.

It wasn't meant to be despite the fact that I am the only female in my family to have only sons. When I was pregnant, I knitted and crocheted countless outfits for a daughter because that was my expectation. Imagine my surprise when it didn't happen. Twice!

It's been years since I have had the experience of male energy and I miss it greatly.

~ Tutte ~