Great news. I found an apartment. The second one I looked at. How great is that? Now I am living on the cusp of leaving a very distateful and depressing lifestyle behind and embracing a new one. My PTSD has not been relieved however disappointing. But how I could I expect it to? It will take time for my mind to get rid of all the garbage.
My fear has now been replaced with the anxiety of all that needs to be done in the final stages of moving. I must remain patient, have had lots of practice so it shouldn't be that difficult. I can pick up the key in 10 days so when I move depends on when I finish packing. Just all the kitchen crap left. It would only take a day if I were stronger and had more stamine.
I have a difficult time sleeping since my mind is so busy with all the last details and future decorating. Sure beats living in a state of constant fear. Last Saturday was the worst day I have ever experienced. I was almost suicidal with the angst of not finding a home. The Universe (God) had once again come to my assistance and I am totally grateful.
Will write more about this process at another time.
~ Tutte ~
